I used to work with an ex-Army guy and an ex-Air Force guy, and one day at lunch in MV, the conversation went something like:
Army Guy – “At Ft. Bragg, they had a sign at the entrance of the base – ‘It’s been X days since our last fatal accident’ – and the number never got into double digits!”
AF Guy – “When you were at Bragg? I was there too. Yeah, that sign was crazy!”
AG – “There was that time when all the paratroopers were standing on the runway in full gear and that cargo plane came tumbling down the runway in a big fireball and the paratroopers were too weighted down to move out of the way!”
AFG – “hahahahaha. Yeah, and there was always some guy back from the field who found out his wife was cheating. Murder-suicide!”
AG – “hahahaha. Yeah, and remember when…”

And they’d go on like that for 15 minutes. So maybe you should have a counter on your homepage of how long its been since your last stitching. Some form of morbid positive feedback

I was going to say, “you could always branch out into bladed weapons for your mixed martial arts if you want more stitches” but the only proper answer to that is something like “I have mastered the Scottish Skean Dhu dagger, the Khukiri, the Kitana Baker and Merovingian Glafe with nary a scratch, sir”

Happy Sunday